Oh to be young and in love once more

20 09 2008

My oldest daughter just turned thirteen and is in the midst of her first (of surely many) puppy love relationships.  It makes me get kind of giddy myself, thinking back to what it was like to be young and in love.

Let me backtrack this a little, as this ‘relationship’ started about four years ago.  We moved to Florida in February of 2005 and she had met a boy at her school who was in fourth grade…she was in third.  They got along well and they continued to be friends through his fifth grade year.  After fifth grade, he was moving on to middle school and over the summer she realized that she wouldn’t likely see him again.  I don’t know if it was a movie that she watched or what but somehow she decided that she had ‘feelings’ for him and acted on them.  She wrote him a heartfelt letter about how much she would miss him and how much he meant to her and included her favourite heart-shaped locket.  She gave the note to a classmate, a boy, who was a neighbour to this interest of hers.

Over the past two years we have ribbed her about how he likely never even got the note or if he did, being young boys, they probably got a chuckle over this girl writing a mushy love letter and giving him her heart locket until they meet again.  Yes, she actually wrote to keep her heart until they meet again.

Flash forward now to seventh grade for her and guess who should happen to have switched schools and be going to her middle school?  You guessed it.  And at first swoon, she was head over heels for him again.  So, trying to avoid any broken hearts this early in the year, I sat her down and explained that he might not remember her.  Also, even if he did, she was only in the seventh grade, he’s in eighth, and that could be a huge difference in his eyes.  Yes, yes, she said I know, and she was fairly convinced he probably had forgotten her and no worries mom.

Day 6 of school he gives her the locket back, explaining he kept the letter and has held on to her locket all of this time and as per her request, here is your heart back now that we’ve met again.  To be honest, I about drove off the damned road when she told me that.

He talked one of her friends into giving her his number and she was ecstatic at first. Then went into denial of some sorts, how she wouldn’t accept his call if he did call her.  I dispelled that by dialing the house with my cell phone and yelling down the hall that she had a call from some boy named Josh.  You’ve never seen anyone fly to the phone as fast as she did!  I paid for that afterwards.  But he didn’t call.  Even two weeks later still no call.  So she finally asked a mutual friend of theirs for his number and somehow mustered the courage to call him.

Now to the present.  The hushed giggly whispered calls, no you hang up, no you, not me.

It’s almost gag me sweet but it makes me smile, inside.  I wish life were always that easy and sweet.  The only moment you dread is when the dial tone hits your ear.  The softest whisper is enough to make the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.  You press the phone tight to your ear and close your eyes, trying to hear every sound and identify it so you feel like you too are there with him.  And when he talks, you can almost feel his breath on your cheek.

Don’t get me wrong, I have romance in my life.  Glenn and I are often romantic and such but adult romance and puppy love are worlds apart.  There are similarities yes, you still get that shiver when you hold hands; the wave of happiness when he drags his fingers along your cheek…but there is still that pressing thought of tomorrow’s conference call, or did I pay the electric bill yet this month, or what in the hell am I going to make for dinner tomorrow night.  You have to get good and drunk to really be able to think of nothing but the man touching you and then I never remember it well enough or just get horny.  Which even then, my mind immediately goes back to fourteen days til the next car payment type thoughts as soon as we light the cigarettes.

How great it would be to go back to that time in life when the world revolved only around whether or not the phone will ring and whether or not he is going to bring up the homecoming dance.  I guess for now I will just live vicariously through her giddy romance until I learn how to have a stress-free life.

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